Sunday, March 6, 2011

I Like Surprises, Honest - Part Three

I already knew that "It is comfortable." And also that it would "require me to stay with him on Friday night." But I had no idea what his surprise was.

The next day there were more hints.

"These won't tell you much of anything but are fun for me to think of:

It isn't all that great.

It is, in nomenclature, tangentially related to the Adams Family (Presidents, not Creepy TV people).

It is gay friendly.

It is still a surprise."

Whhhhhaaaaaaaaaaat? I couldn't figure it out. "Gay friendly." "Gay friendly?" What does that mean?

We are both extremely liberal so I could only assume this referenced something that is typically associated with the gay community. Rainbows? Equality? Same-sex scenarios? Floats? Parades? Political activism? Unions (versus marriage)?

I also started googling the Adams family histories on Wikipedia. Abigail Adams. John Quincy Adams. John Adams. Hmm... "Tangentially related?" Maybe had something to do with the word "White" as in "White House." Then I thought about "John". "Long Johns"? Underwear? Rainbow underwear? Would that be comfortable? It occurred to me that the last time I'd been at Mr. U's I'd forgotten a black lacy (zebra striped) thong. I truly hoped my "surprise" wasn't that he'd recovered my lost "long johns." Or even more hoped that it wasn't something like him WEARING my lacy lost zebra striped "long johns." I mean maybe that is sexy but something tells me it. is. not. (Convince me otherwise if you can).

I still had no idea so I started asking questions. Prodding for more hints...

"Okay, if they don't tell me much of anything, then how are they helpful hints? are these real hints? Also, does this actually REQUIRE me to stay over at your place or do you just want to to stay at your place so we can...???"

"Requires you to stay with me. Well, not 'requires' but would be a total waste if you didn't."

"Is it something permanent? As in my be used multiple times? Or something temporary that is either single use or perishable?"

"A well framed question, but this can be both of those things... as it relates to US, it is single use."

Single use? Hmm.... Candles? Bubble bath? Hopefully not condoms. Ewwww. Food? Edible Underwear (aka Long Johns)? Double ewwwww. (Or not? Convince me otherwise...) And then he volunteered more suspicious information...

"If you're coming straight from work I might intercept we can walk together before I go back to the office. I want to keep der surprize alive a little longer so I won't say why this is so, but it is so."

"P.S. This better not have ANYTHING to do with you shaving your beard. You KEEP THAT BEARD MISTER!"

"Can I trim it?"

"Oh I suppose."

"Ooooh, now I'm thinking about your beard and surprises and long johns and..."

"Hold steady Counselor. Almost to the weekend."

So what did that leave us with?
1. It is comfortable
2. Requires me to stay with me, well not "requires" but would be a total waste if we didn't
3. It isn't all that great
4. It is gay friendly.
5. He might be able to intercept me after work temporarily before he returned to the office
It is, in nomenclature, tangentially related to the Adams Family (Presidents, not Creepy TV people).
7. As it relates to us it is single use.
8. It is still a surprise.

No idea. I was COMPLETELY stumped. AAAAAAArg.

I wrote him one last email:

"This. is. fun."

And this. was. fun. It didn't matter what the surprise was. Thinking about it all week and getting daily hints and writing these emails back in forth. Was fun. And silly. And sweet. And thoughtful.

When Friday rolled around it turned out that I had to work late. There would be no early "interception" of my person beforehand. I had an ENORMOUS duffel bag of my things to take to Mr. U's for the weekend. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with it before our evening events. Whatever we were doing, I was pretty sure I didn't want to haul a bag all over town or try to find a place to put it in a nice restaurant. I called Mr. U and asked him if he'd come by my office and pick it up and take it back to his apartment at some point during the day. "I'd be delighted," he responded cheerfully to my request. "Delighted?" I thought was a strange response. This was a heavy duffel. And walking 8 blocks or so with a duffel bag in the middle of the day was no pleasant feat. It wasn't an impossible or miserable request. But it certainly wasn't "delightful." At any rate, I was delighted he was so forthcoming. I handed off the back some time later in my office lobby. He gave me a kiss and said: "Are you ready for your surprise?" he asked. "More than you know," I assured.

I walked back up to my office and back to my desk. Glaring at my computer for keeping me company this late on a Friday instead of relieving me to go start the weekend with my boyfriend. Then a smile curled up amidst my face. Despite the present work, a future surprise awaited...


vvk said...

tease... :-)

MA said...

dude. it's been a mother effing week. and this is it?? THIS IS IT?!?!

we're not speaking.

ok we are. but only if you tell me how this ends, GODDAMNIT

Toddy said...

Wow guys (vvk and Vittoria) I'm super glad you are avidly reading and excited to know the surprise (as was I!) but didn't you get anything from this post other than that there was a surprise? i.e.(1) I had FUN all week getting hints and wondering what the surprise was. And I have to say, that was even better than the surprise. And I knew that during the process before I knew the answer). (2)while the anticipation might be frustrating in a way it makes my writing that much more "real" because you get to feel and think exactly how I did. How cool is that? (3) there is good stuff in this post other than the surprise itself no? edible underwear yes or no? men who wear women's panties as a turn-on/fetish yes or no? whether or not significant others should change their hair style with or without the other's permission? REALLY? REALLY? Come on! I gave you some good stuff here. I even told you I wore zebra striped panties for christ sake!!!

Vittoria - I truly hope you forgive me. If I can muster the energy in the morning, I will try to write the last and final part which will reveal the answer. Hold Steady V, the morning is almost here...

Cheers! -T.

MA said...

alright i'm feeling better. i must admit, i was on a boltbus back to dc and your post was the one bright thing left in my LIFE at the time. but yes - i did enjoy it all, esp the hilarious hints. i have NO idea what this is going to be. i'm very VERY excited.

and now that i'm off the bus, i can just appreciate this as i do all your mr. u posts - something to look forward to!!!

vvk said...

(1) Clearly Mr. U has been keeping you (mostly) entertained for two months now... thank you for sharing that with us. (2) second degree surprises - while still fun since you're writing is fun - aren't nearly as much fun as first degree surprises. (3) If they were Okapi print undies, that would be interesting...

Anyways, thanks again for your writing... it's entertaining, and it's good to see good things happen to good people.

Toddy said...

Vittoria - like I said in my recent tweet - if I had known about the Bolt bus situation I very well may have BOLTED out of bed, got dressed and written another post for you. Sorry - that sux. Or DM'd you the surprise answer. I PROMISE to write the follow up sometime today. If it gets me fired. (okay well let's not get crazy here...)

vvk- I had to google Okapi. They are cute! Here is the wiki link for anyone else wondering...

Unknown said...
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Jolene said...

WTF could it POSSIBLY BE?!? Oh the suspense...

freckledk said...

Pins and needles, yo.

J said...

I am intrigued!!

Susanlee said...

-sigh- you have the most romantic relationship ever. And you are the biggest tease of all time. Seriously, these cliff hangers must be bad for my blood pressure.

Susanlee said...

Oh wait! The answers!

Edible Underwear: No. It's basically a grow your own yeast infection kit.

Men in women's panties: sometimes. but only if they're not super hairy, and never in a thong.

Change in hairstyle: Sure. I cut my hair all the time without the permission of my partners, they can do the same. Although, I would insist that any of them (epspecially the girl!) not maintain a beard.

Toddy said...

Wow - hey guys SORRY FOR THE CLIFFHANGERS, but it never dawns on me that people ACTUAL read this blog or like it all that much, so I don't realize I'm having any affect whatsoever on anyone's blood pressure. I will try to keep this in mind in the future. Thank you to Jolene, freckledk and J for making me feel LOVED, hah and wanted. (at least my writing anyways) and an extra thank you for Susanlee for answering my rhetorical err no not at all rhetorical questions on underwear fetishes and the like. I'm still pro-beard all the way baby. ALL. THE WAY. but hey, that's just me. And I'm getting a haircut Friday and had to tell Mr. U to prepare himself. He definitely cringed a little. So we, shall see... PART FOUR POSTED YALL!!!! Cheers, T.

Storm. Kat Storm. said...

I'm telling you... Some how, it's a snuggie.

Susanlee said...

So...are you saying you're pro-beard for a woman as well as a man? You are one freaky girl.

Also: questions about knickers and fetishes are never rhetorical.

WV: quitu...-laughs- Ah just cain't quitu...