I have to say this all really surprised me. I've always had a Valentine. Whether it be my parents, my classmates (when you're little and every makes their own construction paper, white doily heart mailboxes), my girl friends, my single friends or yes, many times my boyfriends. But regardless of the company I've kept, I've always liked VDay. So what if its a corporate holiday and corporations trying to sell shit? So what else is new? What's wrong with taking the time out to be nice to one another? And eat candy or chocolates? And wear pink? I don't see the problem here. Then again I'm always a sucker for any occasion to eat gluttonous food accompanied by drinking an inappropriate amount of champagne.
I think I'm allowed to say that I don't understand what the big deal is here? I know, I know - I had a Valentine's Day boyfriend this year - a great one - but still - I didn't have a boyfriend for Valentine's Day 2007, 2008 or 2009. 3 years of apparently sad and lonely single VDays at the ages of 24, 25 and 26. Prime mid-twenties dating years. Seriously. So I can say for certain - that I don't understand why VDay makes singles soooooo unsure of themselves and feel oh so bad they're single. I mean I guess you either feel inadequate and depressed about it all the time. Or you don't. But why is Vday any different?
My parents were married on Valentine's Day 35 years ago. In Washington, D.C. Their home and mine. VDay to me was always a celebration of the strong marriage my loving and supportive parents had for with one another and for the love they had for their children within the family that they built out of that marriage. My father still calls my mother "the love of his life." My mother is hopeful that I will find my own "true love." And they both refer to their marriage as "strong as a rock." Thus, Valentine's Day REALLY meant something to them, to me and to us (our family). Ergo, my mom always gave my brother and I treats. One year, my mom gave me a beaded necklace with lettered beads that spelled out my name. Another year we went and got manicures and pedicures. There were always Hallmark cards and bowls of those hard candy hearts. This year, my grandmother sent me a package from California with a red heart shaped card and one of those red heart-shaped box of chocolates. You know the one - the one where all the chocolates suck and you're always disappointed by the strange fillings in each one and thus end up having one bite of each and throwing the rest out. But hey, it's the thought that counts.
I had a Valentine this year. But we wouldn't spend Valentine's Day together. Not exactly. And it didn't matter. (You'll have to read A Date with A Unicorn: Part 19 to get the scoop. B/c that's how I roll...) Ultimately though, I like taking the extra day and the extra time to put in some extra effort to think about those special people in my life and to do something nice for them. But its not a day to make any one feel bad. And its not a day to spend money you don't have or put pressure on someone for not doing enough. To me its a day that reminds me that "true love" exists in the form of my parent's marriage. Which makes me happy for them. And hopeful for myself.